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Greetings from the Hot Mess Desert
The perfect place to nurse a hangover while fending off rattlesnakes!
Welcome to the unadulterated beauty of the Hot Mess Desert! A true adventurer’s destination for those looking to camp, hike, star-gaze, and throw buckets of fuel on the burning dumpster fire that is your current life. On top of that, you’ll probably end up with a massive sunburn and new appreciation for a tamer life.
Greetings from Bad Decisions Bluff
Breathtaking views of all your bad decisions crashing into the shore!
Welcome to Bad Decision Bluffs, where sky-high hopes and dreams meet the chaotic turbulence of the rough waters below. Perch on the edge—pretty much as far out as you can go—to get the best view of each and every poor decision you’ve ever made, including wearing fancy shoes to hike up a cliff.
Greetings from FOMO Mountain
A great spot to sit and wonder what cool stuff everyone else is doing!
Welcome to FOMO Mountain, a place you frequently visit when you’re scrolling through social media feeds wondering why nobody ever invites you to the really fun stuff like personal family vacations and celebrity destination weddings on private islands where you don’t actually know anyone. It’s simply not fair.
Greetings from The Isle of Self-Pity
A one-way trip to your own private island of feeling sorry for yourself!
Welcome to the Isle of Self Pity, the only vacation destination in the Sea of Wet Hot Tears where you can surf, catch some rays, and bask in the blinding narcissism of knowing that you have it worse than anyone who has ever lived on this wretched and cold-hearted planet.